Loving Him: The One I've Yet To Meet

-

     Have you ever loved someone you've never met, besides your children? It's been seven years since my last lover, my last soulmate.  After him, I told myself that I would wait until I met my next soulmate to enjoy the pleasures of sexual intimacy. I have waited, though I didn't know it be seven years when I began; thanks Universe for not letting me in on that secret. I know who he is, just as sure as I was of my last soulmate.  There are no issues, really, but my mind likes issues about as much as it feigns for anger.  So, instead of being secure in patience and waiting on time, my mind is attempting to rush the journey.  I see what my mind is doing; I won't allow it to control this.

     I don't know if they recognize me.  Sometimes, one soulmate doesn't recognize the other, immediately.  Or, they let the opportunity pass; it's happened to me once before. There was nothing I could do about it except allow them the space to let me pass by.  It was a sad time in the history of my life.  This time I still don't know what will happen; I cannot nor do I want to, control their actions, thoughts.

     They are beautiful, my other half and I can say nothing about this to them; they need to discover this, see me, for themselves.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I Remember The Times: Travelling Through The Balkans As A #woc

-
Image
It is what it is. Being a woman of color travelling alone through The Balkans, through Europe, is not nearly what I thought it would be, wanted it to be. Nature here is more than breathtaking, though at times the wind blowing really does take your breath away. Nature here is powerful, humbling, nurturing. I have learned so much about myself, how I am, why I think the way I do, my fears, my intense thoughts, my ever-changing disdain for willful ignorance amongst individuals. It's true, it's sad, it's reality. People are ignorant, we all are, I am. What makes their ignorance rage-inducing is the fact that many of them love this ignorance, love to bask in the warmth and comfortability of their prolonged and willful ignorance. But their vibe is also giving "accept whatever you can get." Some months ago I had a conversation with someone who stated that I may have to get with someone that is short and fat. Is it possible that the person meant specificall...
Read more

Being Alone While Craving The Energy of Home

-
Image
It wasn't him I was drawn to; it was his energy (yes, there's a difference). He came across as a go-getter, someone who goes after what they want, who does something on their own, when everything and everyone around him is marching to the same monotonous beat. I crave that, someone like me, someone bold, someone kind, someone I won't need to explain myself to before an introduction is even had, someone who isn't swayed by a pretty face or skirt. BUT, definitely not someone who couldn't be totally upfront with me. He could have said something after I left him the first voice message; he didn't. I don't respect what he did; but, I recognize that he is a kind hustler and that is a beautiful thing. Thank you Universe. I was listening to a sistah talk about the word "Universe." She stated that we each have our own "verse" and the point is to unify with others and make beautiful music, a UNI-verse. I long for this, I need it, I ...
Read more

HOME

-
Image
I had to y'all. I couldn't take it anymore, I just straight out said to him, 'it seems like racism to me.' I mean, it really does. He, like another police officer, compared the "migrant problem" in Hungary to the issue with the Mexican/U.S. border. Hmmmm, there is a border there, yes. Individuals do enter illegally there and there us massive hate shown towards the Mexican population because of this. Yes. That still doesn't make it right or take the sting and stench of racism and prejudice from the actions of those in power in Hungary. It's wrong, on both accounts, from both countries. Yes, we in The States are wrong for the way we treat many individuals. I have a very unique perspective in all of this. I am from The States, yes; but, I am also still considered a minority there. In Hungary, the racism is more overt, directly in your face, everyday. In both the U.S. and Hungary, I am seen as "The other." At this point in...
Read more